What WOULD Bekki Eat?

Well, I'll start with what I wouldn't eat. I wouldn't eat margarine. Or tofu. Or lowered-fat anything. Olestra is right out. Hydrolyzed, isolated, evaporated, enriched, or chocolate flavored "phood" won't pass these lips.
What will I eat? Real food. Made-at-home food. Food that my great-great-grandmother could have made, if she had the money and the time. And if she hadn't been so busy trick-riding in a most unladylike way.

Sunday, October 28, 2007

Sunday Coupon Rant, part 2

This morning's paper yielded only one batch of coupons, so there's much less to rant about. However, to ensure that my loyal readers aren't shorted, I will also include a CVS ad WTF Were They Thinking rant.

So ranty. And on only one cup of insipid coffee.

I'll start small. The coupon for Arm & Hammer liquid detergent, now "2x Concentrated." "Half the size, same number of loads," they actually include a visual aid showing the sizes, in case you don't understand. Not unusual... coupons ads are stupid. What makes it worth my rant? The actual coupon. Save $1 on 2. IF IT'S TWICE AS CONCENTRATED, WHY DO I NEED TWO?!?!?
Keep one for myself and give the other as a gift??

On to one of my favorite new stupid items... the Air Wick FreshSweep. It's a broom, same as always, but with Stick Ups inside. So when you sweep you release air freshener. So your house "smells fresh and clean." This is just so stupid. First of all, artificial fragrances just suck. Secondly, if you want your house to smell fresh and clean... clean it. How about actually making something BE what you want it to be, instead of covering up the problem? Wouldn't that be a novel concept in our society?

And, finally (for the coupons)- they hand-fed me a rant. I just couldn't NOT rant about this. Those who know me well will understand. Beech Nut baby food... their newest gimmick is specially-labelled "Good Morning/Good Evening" jars. Because moms are, after all, too dumb to figure out how to feed their kids. But, that's the whole premise behind the blockbuster baby-feeding industry and a whole 'nother rant. And I'll admit, some moms ARE too dumb. So, anyhow... on the page they've got a section for each, and the Good Morning section says (I kid you not) "Fiber to Keep Babies Satisfied."
My jaw dropped.
Where else have we all heard about fiber? To what segment of the population is it heavily marketed? People on diets, right? Are the babies of America on a diet?! Fiber to keep them satisfied??? Well, of course we don't want the whiny brats asking for more food before lunchtime. Make 'em think they're full! Make 'em think they're getting what they need. They AREN'T, but as long as they're quiet, who cares?
Double grrrrrrr...

On to CVS-

Are these items related?: Page 4 of the ad has a grouping of ridiculous items. The Grill Master and I came to our own conclusions as to how they relate to each other. They are: gumball machine, handheld massagers, binoculars, wet/dry shaver, hot chocolate pot, and a mug warmer. Let me know how you think they go together!

I think they've finally run out of ideas: Page 9 shows a collection of bath and body products that share the same, weird scent- whipped cream on a walnut. When I told the Grill Master he had to shake his head and have me say it again. Then he had to get up and come see it for himself. We agree that they must have finally run out of weird combinations for "new" smells. Lavender-Mint, Vanilla-Rose, Cinnamon Bun are too old-school. I sometimes wonder if they have a database of smell words that they randomly combine.

These things DO go together: On page 19 there are items near each other that do, unfortunately, go together. I wish I had time to provide links, to show you why, but I need breakfast. The items are- an insulin pen, Boost (sugar-laden, dead milk-based, plastic-protein-enhanced "nutritional beverage,") and Triscuits (extruded glutenous, simple-carb "healthy" snack.)
Yes, these items are related... buy the food, get the chance to use the insulin free!

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About Me

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Tejas, United States
I am many things... all at the same time. (No wonder I don't get much done!) I am a wife to a retired infantryman, mother of 3, stocker (and stalker) of the fridge, passionate fan of food, nutrition, ecology, coffee, wine, and college football. I love all things witchy and piratey. I often cook with booze. I feed stray cats. I don't believe in sunscreen. I don't like shoes and really hate socks. And I currently can't eat any gluten, dairy, eggs, soy, coconut(!?), or sodium metabisulfite (aw, shucks, no chemical snackies.) Sometimes even citric acid gets me. But only sometimes.