What WOULD Bekki Eat?

Well, I'll start with what I wouldn't eat. I wouldn't eat margarine. Or tofu. Or lowered-fat anything. Olestra is right out. Hydrolyzed, isolated, evaporated, enriched, or chocolate flavored "phood" won't pass these lips.
What will I eat? Real food. Made-at-home food. Food that my great-great-grandmother could have made, if she had the money and the time. And if she hadn't been so busy trick-riding in a most unladylike way.

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Shark Attack

I. Am. So. Full.

And so is my dishwasher.

But it's broken. I think I should back up a bit.

On Iron Chef Mom days, the Grill Geek goes to the store around lunchtime to get the Theme Ingredient. I told him to "be nice to me" because I wasn't feeling well and our Little Guy was already sick.
What's he come home with?


Um... ok.... Thanks for being easy on me, honey.

Turned out to be absolutely fabulous... I dug around online, searching for inspiration, and got the idea of fish tacos... and a menu was born. This glorious meal/feast was almost unraveled many times... true chaos in the kitchen. The Little Guy really wanted to help, as usual, and per the Rules of Iron Chef Mom, I had to let him. So, I almost lost all my lime juice to the floor (and didn't have more limes), dirtied twice as many dishes as necessary, got my foot stompled right after I almost amputated a fingertip (luckily my own), kept the Little Guy busy with the spice jars (all glass... yikes!) and somehow he didn't
dump out the cilantro until after everything was done.

Little Guy lined up the spices...

So, this wonderful meal was truly brought about with blood, sweat, and tears. And it was worth it. Without further ado...

KYO NO TEMA... Same! (Sah-mee)

Shark Tacos with Chili-Lime Slaw

First, the order in which to do things:

- If you have a rice cooker, get that started. I like to use coconut milk for half the liquid, but I have no idea if that works well on the stovetop. I love my rice cooker.
- Juice 2 limes

- Melt 3 T coconut oil (unless it's warm in your house and it's already
- Make the marinade... stick the shark in said marinade... in the fridge.

- Make Chili-Lime Slaw sauce

- Make salsa

- Start the black beans/corn Thing

- Heat the grill (I delegated this to my sous-chef, the Grill Geek)

- Peel and slice mango. Carefully. I can't stress this enough. Never, ever cut toward any part of your body with a Very Sharp Knife. It's a bad idea. Don't do it. I certainly wouldn't...
- Grill the shark, basting with coconut oil, grill time depends on the thickness of the fish.

- Toss shredded cabbage with Chili-Lime Slaw sauce, thereby making Slaw

- Toast/warm corn tortillas in a skillet with a bit of bacon fat

This all went really quickly, even with all the interruptions we had. I didn't use all my 70 minutes. I also didn't remember to start the timer. But I know I didn't use all my time.
Now, for the recipes...


2 T lime juice
2 T melted coconut oil
smoked paprika


Put shark in a ziplock, add marinade ingredients, close, and shake-shake-shake. Refrigerate.

Chili-Lime Slaw

1/2 cup Hellman's mayo

1 tsp hot pepper paste

2 T lime juice

½ tsp cumin

generous squirt of agave nectar


Stir. Refrigerate.


about 1 cup diced tomatoes, drained
½ cup red onion, minced
1 small cucumber, peeled, seeded, and diced
4 cloves garlic, minced
1 T balsamic vinegar
1 T white vinegar
1 T dried cilantro
½ tsp Mexican oregano
salt and pepper, to taste

Mix... stir... let sit, mingling the flavors, stir when you pass by...

Black Bean/Corn Thing:

2 T bacon fat (mmm... bacon...)

1/4 diced red onion
1 clove garlic, chopped

1 can black beans
1 cup frozen corn kernels

smoked paprika, cayenne, and salt, to taste

1 T lime juice

Cook the onion and garlic in bacon fat, until starting to soften. Add the black beans, corn, and some liquid if it needs it. Heat through. Add spices. Leave to simmer over lowest heat. When it's time to serve, remove from heat and stir in lime juice.
There's the grilled shark, in it's cage. Turned the tables on that one, didn't we? Anyway... once the shark is done, break it up with a fork.

Assembling the tacos... I put a spoonful of slaw on each tortilla, topped with luscious grilled shark, and put the salsa in a little bowl, to let each diner decide for themselves. I tossed the mango slices with agave nectar and lime juice, because it wasn't quite ripe yet... needed some pizazz. The Black Bean/Corn Thing went atop rice, with some more cilantro (wish I had fresh), and the last little bit of lime juice went in my margarita. Delish.

And after all that, the fully-loaded dishwasher began to smoke. Oh, well. I don't really care.

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About Me

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Tejas, United States
I am many things... all at the same time. (No wonder I don't get much done!) I am a wife to a retired infantryman, mother of 3, stocker (and stalker) of the fridge, passionate fan of food, nutrition, ecology, coffee, wine, and college football. I love all things witchy and piratey. I often cook with booze. I feed stray cats. I don't believe in sunscreen. I don't like shoes and really hate socks. And I currently can't eat any gluten, dairy, eggs, soy, coconut(!?), or sodium metabisulfite (aw, shucks, no chemical snackies.) Sometimes even citric acid gets me. But only sometimes.